BlissChick

Have you taken a LEAP today?

This week I received a call from someone who found my website and really needed some support.  It was apparent in the first moments of the call, this person was suffering…and my heart went out to her.  It did not take long to see why and the fact is that almost everyone experiences what this person shared with me at one time or another and it is what this person became acutely aware of on the day we talked.

You know that place between where you have been and where you are going?  You wake up one day or over a period of days or years to realize that you are capable of far more than you have allowed yourself so far.    I’ve heard it so many times with the people I have worked with and lived it myself. Whether it is a long term relationship, a career, a group of people or even living in your own skin that doesn’t seem to fit anymore… The growing pains and the ache of unrealized potential can shake you to your core.

The fear and discomfort alone is enough to have us running for the carbs, the next guy or girl or even the stereotypical convertible.  All to fill the hole of the past we just left behind.  It might be what some have defined as a midlife crisis… and while it may not feel good or easy it serves a purpose that is often misunderstood.  I see it as an opportunity to grow and expand and see just what you are made of.

This does comes with some side effects that if avoided can be detrimental to your growth, expansion and pursuit of happiness.  First you need to bask in the un-comfortableness of not knowing PERIOD… and I mean not knowing.  Try that on for a moment… feel like running?  Or has your mind just gone into overdrive grasping at straws and saying yeah but?  Or maybe you’re tempted to stop reading now?….  I understand… I do and there is something special about this wide open space called the unknown that few of us allow ourselves because of the fears, anxiety, the avoiding with the tricky seductive carbs, flings and convertibles.

Okay, back to what is so special about this space called the unknown.  It is in this space that the new has room to show up. That’s big don’t you think?  So often it is tempting to go back to what you know or settle for less than what you want.  But what if it is in this space and this space only… you get the bits and pieces or the epiphany that changes the course of your life. 

Once you get the bits and pieces, the AHA’s then you LEAP.  The truth is if we practice leaping often… like the apple a day theory, it may have prevented the crisis or the sudden uncomfortable awareness that we are not where we want to be.   It is as if all those leaps we thought of taking… but didn’t, caught up with us to say, “you still have time”… what will you do with it?

So that is the question right?  Whether you are in the murky middle… the in between or even just starting to feel an ache or longing for something more.  You are being invited into the unknown even if just to be curious, to know something you didn’t know before and when you know then and only then you have an opportunity to LEAP.

You still have time… What will you do with it?

Wendi

The Bliss Chick

P.S. For help with painful discomfort and side effects or to remove the fear of leaping I recommend joining me at the next Bliss Bootcamp!

"O" Knows Best

Every time you supress some part of yourself or allow others to play you small, you are in essence ignoring the owner's manual your creator gave you and destroing your design. ~ Oprah Winfrey

A Conversation with Howard

Late in the week I knew I was due for a day to myself and today was the day.  I woke up feeling that I should do the laundry, get the house cleaned up and various other could be priorities… but the beach was calling so I drove north and landed in Laguna Beach.

I still felt distracted even as I headed out feeling that I should do some other things on the way but next thing I knew I was parked and headed to my favorite store Art for the Soul, then a tasty Carmel Apple and to a vacant bench on an otherwise crowded beach with my latest read.

I had the bench to myself and for a cool February day the sun was straight overhead it was warm and toasty and had me forgetting it was still winter… only in California :0)

I was savoring my last slice of Carmel apple when a man walked up and asked if he could share the bench to which my reply was “of course….” There were many people around coming and going taking up residence on the bench next to us as I started to read.  I looked over and commented to the man sharing the bench with me what a beautiful day it was and he agreed saying “ah yes paradise” and our conversation began.

He started to tell me how he was always here, that this was his spot and that amazing things always seem to happen here.   He also shared that tomorrow is his 83^rd birthday and that he had experienced a pretty great life.  Highs and lows he said but it was in this place on the bench that he said his life was at it’s greatest.  Where he ponders on how grateful he is for his health although he said his mind got fuzzy every now and then, to live in paradise and have the experiences he had, he shared he couldn’t ask for anything more.  I imagined that was true from this place.

He started to share ideas and experiences in his life and I realized this was no accident me sharing this bench with Howard. We were immediate friends and he was saying the very things I had been thinking right then… even capturing the subtitle of a book I hadn’t gotten out of my bag yet in our conversation.  Which by the was “While designing your lifestyle, remember to live…” 

He shared that in his 83 years he had seen a lot, made some tough but authentic choices, had a battle with alcohol but now rather than dancing on bar tables he could just enjoy this bench, watching people, feeling the water on his feet for his afternoon walks.  More people started to come by and sit closer, you could tell they were listening in as I am sure Howard and I looked like an odd pair.   They wanted to know what was going on and what we were talking about so they listened in and it was fine... one woman sat on the edge of the bench next to us leaning in and heard him say my name and said “my name is Wendi too”.  Another couple walked up with a video camera and wanted to interview Howard for his You Tube talk Show –  I was starting to think Howard had earned a reputation I was unaware of. Howard seemed as surprised as I and replied “ I don’t know what they want with me, I don’t know them, I am just me, here on my bench.”

He had said it was a special day, to have this conversation and connection and I agreed... I was grateful.  He said some very touching things, telling me to use my gift, to not hide my light as if he knew what that was and was ever  re-assuring about my direction, he seemed surprised that I was so receptive and understood where he was coming from.

It was the simple things he said… that what happened here on this bench is what it is really all about.. not all the nice cars driving up and down main street as we spoke or the glitz and the glamour as he put so well.  You could tell this man really lived all the days of his life… maybe some fame, maybe some fortune, certainly some challenges and yet he said the best stuff wasn’t flashy it was just about connecting like this and being receptive.  He pointed out that people always come around when you’re having fun… connecting, they want to know how, they want to be a part of it and sure enough the people kept coming joining in, listening in.

I looked around and took in the things he saw from this bench .. there was a beautiful girl from Europe asking passerby’s to take her picture as she posed seductively, there was a girl who had this awe and wonder about her bouncing and laughing from dog to child… Howard told me that someone lets her loose and she is not all there… he worries for her.  There were couples on the grass behind us and thinkers on the benches beside us.  The things and people he must of met and connected with over the years… and today was my day.  He made it seem as if I was the only one but my hunch is that he has touched many lives in this very spot... pointing out their gifts, encouraging people to use them and setting a mighty fine example by sharing his.

I knew my parking meter would be expiring shortly and I gave Howard a kiss on the cheek and told him I would see him here again.   He told me where his favorite spots were and he said please do this again, sit by him and start a conversation even if he didn’t remember me.  I smiled and walked away feeling like I had given and received a gift all at the same time.  Much better than the laundry that awaited me at home.

Happy Birthday Howard!  You are a gift!

Wendi

Speaking of Gifts

A friend and I love to hangout out at Barnes and Noble and drink coffee and peruse the latest books... while checking out I stumbled upon these great little gifts books that had us laughing out loud and getting the rest of the line involved... I think we help sell a couple extra copies and picked up a couple for ourselves.. my laughs will definitely be re-gifted :0)

                                               

Excerpt.......always be ready to learn something new everyday

Practice safe eating.... Always use condiments!

                                     

Just Plain Fun!

Wendi

"Expect the Unexpected"

I like surprises… not the kind where people pop out of cakes, or dark alleys but the kind where you know you are alive because something or someone has reached out and connected… touched your life or maybe you them.

Do you know what I mean?   You get the chills, goose bumps, butterflies or an exciting little rush.  It feels like a magical moment that really when you slice and dice it… is always sooo simple but seemingly elusive.

I remember being at a restaurant one time and our waitress was fantastic; I mean she really stood out.   I can’t put my finger on what she did that was so special but it was memorable and I think the tip we left her was too.  They don’t call Disneyland the happiest place on earth for nothing. The people there surprise you with their kindness and attention to detail.  My grandmother who worked there for 35 years might disagree but to visit they accomplish their goal and it feels a bit magical.  It’s like the rush I get when I pay for the person coffee behind me in the Starbucks drive-thru or turn up the nice with the most difficult of people.  It’s doing the unexpected... shaking things up a bit.  The only thing I am curious about is why it is unexpected… what is expected is often mediocre and quite frankly boring.

I realize this question applies to me too and here’s what happens in that moment where I can choose the unexpected or settle for mediocrity. Maybe you can relate to the tapes that play… “the appointments, meetings, don’t have the extra time, don’t have the extra money, what if they don’t like it or me, and today I am just sooo tired, what if I am embarrassed or a little over the top, or the classic nobody goes out of their way any more, they’ll think I’m a freak ????

By then the opportunity has passed you by or has been quickly squashed like a bug…. 

Then there is the issue of supply and demand… after all if you give all your love, laughter, compassion, creativity and genius away, what will you be left with? So many reasons and yet last time I checked the last few listed here like love and laughter come in an endless supply and are probably the most renewable resource on the planet and the others, the excuses, they don’t hold a candle to the goose bumps!

 

As elusive as they may be, everyday I wish and intend to be pleasantly surprised.  I want to witness something special, generous, bold, truthful, vulnerable and all out unexpected.  Life is just more fun and meaningful when people and days are not as we could predict them to be.  So while wishing and intending are a fabulous start… the real AHA for me and I hope for you, is the unexpected and the new starts with us. I choose to look at this desire to be surprised as an invitation to be the unexpected in each day and accept the challenge to risk enough everyday to feel truly alive. 

Here's to something pleasantly surprising ~

Wendi

Scarlett Picks Obama as her Valentine Candidate

Imagine my surprise today when I received a call from Scarlett Johannson declaring her love and support for Obama one day before "Super Tuesday".  It was a pre-recorded kick in the pants to get me and I am sure millions of others out and vote.

There are so many things to consider... issues, life experience, integrity just to name a few.  You can catch the debates, as it appears more numbers than ever have this year. You can read up on blogs, check out the political analyst, watch progressive cable shows and get a taste of what feels like a very different Presidential Race.  People seem excited and passionate about the candidates and what is at stake.  It's refreshing!

Contagious even....  catching the debates between Spongebob and dinner, being begged to change the channel or suffer the consequences of a 7 year old dance and taunt in front of the TV screen or the classic tug o' war over the remote.  Even with the distractions there was still something  happening for me,  I was seeing faces, hearing words and getting bits and pieces and I was feeling something.  Connected or disconnected, engaged or confused, inspired or bored... it is not just in the content of what is being said but the energy behind it.  The smiles, the ease, the tension, the sweat, the blunders, the pokes, the avoiding, the confronting, the sense of humor and comraderie, the looks, the same ole', or something new.... again some refreshing some not so much...

While I don't plan to get into a debate myself about politics, there is very clear distinction in this race for me as to what feels good and what does not.  That along with information, issues, integrity and experience are all ingredients in making a choice and being once again inspired to vote!  Ahhh refreshing!

Wendi